What it takes to be a lawyer
A New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA (Federal Housing
Administration) loan for a client. He was told that the
loan would be granted if he could prove satisfactory title
to a parcel of property being offered as collateral.
The title to the property dated back to 1803, which took
the lawyer three months to track down.
After sending the information to FHA, he received the
following reply:
"Upon review of your letter adjoining your client's loan
application, we note that the request is supported by an
Abstract of Title. While we compliment the able manner in
which you prepared and presented the application, we must
point out that you have only cleared the Title to the
proposed collateral property back to the year 1803.
Before final approval can be accorded, it will be
necessary to clear the title back to its origin."
Annoyed, the lawyer responded as follows:
" You letter regarding Titles in Case NO. 189156 has been
received. I note that you wish to have Titles extended
further than the 194 years covered by the present
application.
I was unaware that any educated person in this country,
particularly those working in the property arena, would
not know that Louisiana was purchased by the U.S. from
France in 1803, the year of origin identified in our
application.
For the edification of uninformed FHA bureaucrats, the
title to the land prior to U.S.ownership was obtained from
France, which had acquired it by Right of Conquest from
Spain. The land came into possession of Spain by Right of
Discovery made in the year 1492 by a sea captain named
Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the privilege
of seeking a new route to India by the then reigning
monarch, Isabella.
The good queen, being a pious woman and careful about
titles, almost as much as the FHA, took the precaution of
securing the blessing of the Pope before she sold her
jewels to fund Columbus' expedition.
Now the Pope, as I'm sure you know, is the emissary of
Jesus Christ, the Son of God. And God, it is commonly
accepted, created this world. Therefore, I believe it is
safe to presume that He also made that part of the world
called Louisiana. I hope now you are satisfied.
Now, may we please have our loan?